david's trials & tribulations of life

Woah! Where have I been?! Forget about the past, and back to the present. Where am I now? One minute I am in Silsoe, the armpit of England, dealing with an anally retentive, conceited and deprecating little man (that would be my thesis supervisor) and the next I am in Washington DC schmoozing with Angelina Jolie (and let me tell you, she is none of those things). First let me tell you of the five days I spent in England with my 82 year-old granny… Basically it entailed one too many visits to Yeovil City Hospital, sitting by a hospital bed in a ward full of pasty, frail octogenarians. My granny had had a couple of mini heart attacks, and was duly put into hospital for observation. And so my nights were spent trawling through my granny’s underwear drawer (wincing all the way I might add) in order to give her clean clothes the next day. All in the midst of packing all my stuff and counting down the days before shipping all my worldly possessions, and ultimately myself, to the capital of...

Hello. My name is David Bonnardeaux. I am 28, and a very humiliated member of the unemployment club. In the previous instalment of David’s Trials and Tribulations of Life I wrote: “I am not getting too used to the slow life of Ibiza, as I will shoot off to Barcelona when the contacts finally get ‘activated.’ If all goes well Jillian may come over and we will live happily ever after. Yipppeee! The End….” What about that End, eh? How deluded was I? Very. As they say in England, I am still “on the dole.” As they say in France, “sans emploi;” as they say in España, “sin empleo;” or as I like to say, “fucked”. A definite deja vu from my time after Edinburgh University (Ah, I remember fondly those days when my friend Nick so sensitively left Dole© pineapple tags hanging on my door) and my time after getting back from Mexico looking for work from Ibiza and then Bristol. As you can see, Great Britain has always been a factor there, and hence why I have turned my back on that bleak and insula...